Name: Toiba Shafat Kaul.
Email: toibakoul@gmail.com
Along with its breathtaking scenic beauty, Kashmir is popularly known for its culture and the cultural heritage. From its samovar chai to its traditional dance, every corner of Kashmir reflects its Culture. Beautiful, isn’t it?
Coming from Kashmir, the vaadi of Culture, I know how important it is to respect the culture and follow it. Though there is a wonderful picture of the cultural practices of Kashmir but there is an evil side to it.
There is a certain section of the state that is the most affected by these evil yet highly prestigious practices of the culture. It is since ages that every woman has been particularly categorized as “Koúri Möhníéû” so as to remind her that she is supposed to be bound in the four walls of her house, that she can never ever, even by mistake think of comparing herself to a male, that she will always be dominated by the men, that she will always be of a status lower than the men, that she is a female and her being a female is her only mistake. This culture has always been a male chauvinistic one and given men the power to do anything, literally anything and every thing men do is considered to be perfect, correct and non objectionable. Women have been the major victims of the cultural practices. The have been the real sufferers. This land has witnessed so many women succumbing to the pressure of the society. Well, I doubt the ancestors inventing this culture to have even considered the women as humans at all.
Indeed, the times have changed so has practicing the culture. The typical practices of burying a girl child, not letting a girl to be literate have thankfully vanished but this doesn’t allow any of us to believe that the oppression is over. A woman is still cursed and considered to be the reason of a girl child being born, she is still asked for dowry, she is still beaten by her husband, she is still not allowed to earn, she is still not free, she is still cursed and abused and it is all still normal.
Women, in the name of culture are robbed of their prestige, their self esteem and even their basic right. A woman is raised being taught her duties only leaving behind the fact that she deserves her rights too. A culture like this where being a woman is a sin is a curse in itself.
For a fact, it is not particularly men who have been subjecting women to this pressure but the real foe of a woman is a woman only. It has been well exemplified by the Kashmiri women themselves. A mother teaches her daughter that she is always inferior to her husband, pampering her son more than her daughter, not letting her daughter to be financially independent. The first person to have cursed a woman on giving birth to a girl child is always her mother-in-law. It is indeed women who have played a crucial role in making our society male dominant, sometimes because of the pleasure they attain by harassing other women and sometimes because of succumbing to the stereotypes.
Although we’re not really independent in our thoughts, confined to a narrow vision, yet we can stand up together to bring about a change, to make this world a free space to live in, to be the change.