When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone? If the thought of doing so is too old-school for you, it might be helpful to know that letter-writing has benefits beyond helping you work on your penmanship (or typing skills, if you prefer).
For Sabrina Ooi, co-founder of mental health platform Calm Collective Asia, it was a way for her to process grief and loss, in particular, the death of a former boyfriend when she was 17.
“I was still upset about the fact that he had passed away in his sleep. I didn’t know how to process (his death) at that time,” the 30-year-old told CNA Lifestyle.
On top of that, Ooi was also coping with the loss of a friend through suicide.
“I wrote a letter to each of them and (spent a few hours writing it). It was very emotional but liberating at the same time because it wasn’t something that I commonly talk about,” said Ooi. “That helped me recognise my remaining emotions and turn them into feelings of gratitude.”
Afterwards, she burned the letters – and felt the emotional weight lift off her shoulders.
“It felt like I was able to let go of emotions that I have been holding on to for a long time,” she added. “When you write it out, it also helps you to ‘edit’ your story to find a healthier relationship with the emotions you are feeling.”
Letter writing was also cathartic for Nanny Eliana, one of the contributors to the Singapore anthology Letter to My Mother, in which 20 authors wrote about growing up with their mothers in the form of a letter.
The 42-year-old, who’s the founder of regional healthcare communications agency Bridges M&C, told CNA Lifestyle that she was adopted as a baby as her biological parents could not afford to have a third child. She only learnt of her adoption when she was 18.
Thereafter, she was sent by her adoptive family to live with her biological mother for eight years until her death. Writing a letter to her, said Eliana, was a culmination of all the work she had put into her mental health, including therapy.